Showing posts with label pastry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pastry. Show all posts
Sunday, November 21, 2010
The Pastry Chef, Seduction and the Robbers
The names have been changed to project me from getting sued, but I swear to Polish Jesus not an iota of this story has to be embellished, c'mon......if you work in the Food Show long enough, you don't need too
When I was in my early to mid 20's I took a job at a bakery where I was working the bench. during the last 3 hours of my shift each night a woman named Doris came in to do the Pastry. Doris must have been in her late 30's and she had that special "Aunt Bea" quality about her.
I'm trying to be nice here....can I say that she was portly, or is that an adjective best used with male torso's? OK then....Doris was pretty fat, had long straight hair, about the same length and color of Susan Day (back when she played Lori Partridge). Her vision was horrid, so she had to wear glasses which were made from the same kind of wire that math teachers and youth pastors choose.
For a couple months we didn't talk much, but when we did it was usually focused on our days immediate tasks. That's why I was shocked on a mid November evening when she called me over to her station. After offering me a treat from her finished pieces, she pulled an envelope out of her purse. The contents were a pile of photos that was as thick as a stack of I-Hop pancakes. OMG how I hate moments like this, It could have been tolerable if I thought there was a remote chance that I would be featured in some of the shots, but I knew that just wasn't the case.
During situations like this I typically rifle through the pack as quick as possible and make generic comments that let people know that I really don't care, but at least I fulfilled my minimal social obligation.
However - However - However....LOL, on the top of the stack there was a picture of Doris posing in prostitute like clothing (not that I know how brothel attendants dress). I chuckled out loud. I was shocked that Doris had a fun loving side to her. Remember.....we were just a couple weeks past Halloween so I assumed that these were pictures from a party, but when I got down to the 8th or 9th shot.......she had a plastic ball bungee corded into her mouth, and a big out of shape man was lording over her with things in his hands this i have since mentally blocked out.
I swear to Caesar I blushed so hard, so fast that I had Casper feet within seconds. My eyes must of shot out of my head like Buckwheats used to in the Little Rascals because at that point Doris didn't wait for me to resume looking at the pile, she gently took them from me and put them pack in her purse.
I did my best to act all cool and unaffected, but we both knew I'd need to run for shelter.
During the next couple days nothing "David Lynch" like happened and I just kinda figured we'd ride the moment out together on an awkward wake, but then when nobody was close by she called me over. I figured she was either going to apologize or delude her previous actions......BUT, SHE STARTED UP WITH ME AGAIN!!!!!!!!
"You know Klecko I was talking to my husband, and I told him that I showed you our pictures and he said that he'd love for you to come over after work tonight and he would share me with you. He works security and gets home around midnight, so we'd have about 1/2 hour to get started without him!"
HaHaHa, I don't know what freaked me out more....the invitation, or the fact that these people even thought I was in their league (you gotta remember i was a young Golden Adonis at the time).
I didn't say anything, I just turned my back and she issued the question....
"C'mon Klecko.....Yes or No"?
I swear I didn't know how to respond to such a thing, as much as I hate to admit it, Danny Klecko has always been a naive rube. I ended up turning around and stretching out my arm (palm facing her) and said "I rebuke you in the name of all that's holy!"
I stole this quote from Mr Rourke on Fantasy Island when he got into a 2 episode conflict with Roddy McDowell who wore a black suit / red tie and represented some sort of Satan character.It was a "go to" phrase in the neighborhood I grew up in when somebody really pissed you off, but you could only use it on special occasions that denoted urgency.
Doris kinda freaked out after I rebuked her, and then I followed up with some other phrases that I won't repeat. By this time our co workers started to mill around, and when my supervisor came to investigate I yelled out loud enough for all to hear that Doris was trying to "do it" with me and her husband at the same time.
The supervisor turned and looked at her and asked her if the allegations were true, and to the ol' girls credit she said "Yes-yes they are." and then she punched out, went home and never came back.
A couple weeks later on a Tuesday night (i remember cuz i always had Saturdays and Tuesdays off) I was watching the news and they showed video surveillance film of a bank robbery. The culprits were Doris and her husband. They got caught and ended up getting sent away for a long time.
When I look back there is an element of disbelief in my mind, but w/o a doubt the hospitality industry introduces you to such a diverse element.
For awhile I kinda felt bad and painted scenarios as to why Doris still had some redeeming qualities, but as time marched on. I became content that in all journey's you're going to get weirdness placed in your path, how you respond to these situations (not if you resond) will define your charactor.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Pastry People
The following question was sent to me by an industry friend "Hey Klecko, are all Pastry people temperamental?"
The source wasn't looking for an answer, as much as looking for somebody to commiserate with. He was working on project with a collegue and apparently the two of them got into a knock down drag out. The first thing you need to realize is that the pastry camp is huge.
If somebody asked you if you liked birds...what would that mean to you? Your perception might be the cute Red Robin that graces your lawn plucking earth worms from the;earth on sun filled mornings. The person who asked it might have had a Pelican that spends have it's day pooping sardine looking stuff all over their favorite boat.
I don't have all day to erase ignorance, so let uncle Klecko split Pastry People into 2 camps first (and remenber, these camps could be split again, and again, and again) and perhaps later if the spirit moves me, we can take the topic deeper.
Pasrty Worker and Pastry Chef
The Pastry Worker often times executes their pastry menu in addition to other menus such as bread and / or cakes. they often times spend the first couple years of their training on a sheeter where they prepare Sweet / Puff Pastry / Croissant / Danish doughs.
When this task is complete and often times it will take up 1/2 a shift) the Pastry Guy / Girl will do doughnuts, coffee cakes, muffins, tie figure eights, roast nuts, and pretty much attend to the production of wares that you might find in grocery stores, gas stations or diners. If you had to make a general charactorization of this person....they are affable, hard working but not intense, have varied interests...and maybe most importantly, won't finish their career in this field.
The Pastry Chef often times (more often than not in fact) will not even work in a bakery but in a restaurant. Many of these folks have culinary educations and have to have the ability to work hard w/o being supervised. They are the only person in the building who knows how to do their job. Very few concepts can afford more than one Pastry Chef or a person with the itteligence to direct them. In my opinion this indavidual has to be more diversified than anybody in the hospitality industry.
As a bread baker there just is not a huge difference between making a German Rye and a Whole Grain basket, but in the world of preparing peoples most coveted treats......the menu changes often. Pastry Chefs also have to come in to their space and do most of the work prior to the Chefs coming in or their need for certain pieces of equipment will collide. Therefore Pastry Chef is stuck alone listening to Talk Radio by them selves as they stir compotes or bake high end scones.
The down side to being a Pastry Chef is that there are a lot of people doing it, this has really deluded their pay scale. Although there are not a lot of proficient people in this market...managment typically has the upper hand. They flaunt (through inuendo and akward silence) that they have raw talent banging at the door.
Yes my friends...if you find a talented Pastery Chef, hold onto them with your life. Like an honest mechanic, they are hard to replace.
The source wasn't looking for an answer, as much as looking for somebody to commiserate with. He was working on project with a collegue and apparently the two of them got into a knock down drag out. The first thing you need to realize is that the pastry camp is huge.
If somebody asked you if you liked birds...what would that mean to you? Your perception might be the cute Red Robin that graces your lawn plucking earth worms from the;earth on sun filled mornings. The person who asked it might have had a Pelican that spends have it's day pooping sardine looking stuff all over their favorite boat.
I don't have all day to erase ignorance, so let uncle Klecko split Pastry People into 2 camps first (and remenber, these camps could be split again, and again, and again) and perhaps later if the spirit moves me, we can take the topic deeper.
Pasrty Worker and Pastry Chef
The Pastry Worker often times executes their pastry menu in addition to other menus such as bread and / or cakes. they often times spend the first couple years of their training on a sheeter where they prepare Sweet / Puff Pastry / Croissant / Danish doughs.
When this task is complete and often times it will take up 1/2 a shift) the Pastry Guy / Girl will do doughnuts, coffee cakes, muffins, tie figure eights, roast nuts, and pretty much attend to the production of wares that you might find in grocery stores, gas stations or diners. If you had to make a general charactorization of this person....they are affable, hard working but not intense, have varied interests...and maybe most importantly, won't finish their career in this field.
The Pastry Chef often times (more often than not in fact) will not even work in a bakery but in a restaurant. Many of these folks have culinary educations and have to have the ability to work hard w/o being supervised. They are the only person in the building who knows how to do their job. Very few concepts can afford more than one Pastry Chef or a person with the itteligence to direct them. In my opinion this indavidual has to be more diversified than anybody in the hospitality industry.
As a bread baker there just is not a huge difference between making a German Rye and a Whole Grain basket, but in the world of preparing peoples most coveted treats......the menu changes often. Pastry Chefs also have to come in to their space and do most of the work prior to the Chefs coming in or their need for certain pieces of equipment will collide. Therefore Pastry Chef is stuck alone listening to Talk Radio by them selves as they stir compotes or bake high end scones.
The down side to being a Pastry Chef is that there are a lot of people doing it, this has really deluded their pay scale. Although there are not a lot of proficient people in this market...managment typically has the upper hand. They flaunt (through inuendo and akward silence) that they have raw talent banging at the door.
Yes my friends...if you find a talented Pastery Chef, hold onto them with your life. Like an honest mechanic, they are hard to replace.
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