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Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentines Night, Poinsettas and the Russian Jew

Danny Klecko has always enjoyed Valentines Day, in fact....if you follow the life of your favorite baker, pretty much everyday is Valentines Day!

Just ask Sue McGleno, she'll tell you that he pretty much falls in love once a week with some new bird that flys across his radar.

Some women would be threatened by that, but not Klecko's little Russian-Jew, she'll confess to you that life with a baker is kind of a marathon.

All the social retardation that has been infused into her husband is more than she (or most women) could logically bare.

So at the Sue McGleno household....there is one simple rule, no more than 2 hours of Klecko time, on any given day. If for some reason Klecko only gets 90 minutes, the omitted 1/2 hour doesn't carry over......2 HOURS A DAY and no more!

Some people say Valentines Day is a hoax and everyday we should all celebrate love. I couldn't agree more, but none the less that does not mean you should ignore romance. Guys, I don't care if you have been married 500 years, birthdays-anniversary's and V-Day have to be epic.

I'm not insisting that you drop thousands of dollars (but if you can afford it, you should) to have a good time, use some imagination.

I remember several years ago it was December 1st and Klecko saw a poinsetta @ Korte's Grocery store. He bought it, and brought it home to Sue McGleno.

She loved it.

If you are a hitman hired to kill Klecko....let me give you a hint, just set your rifle scope on the automatic opening doors at this Highland Park grocery, and chances are you won't have to wait long before earning your wage.

So the next day I'm in the cashiers line, and Nancy the check out clerk asks.....

"Danny, did your wife like the poinsettas?"

"Did she?" I replied....."She loved them!"

At this point it was suggested that I buy another, so I did, and when Sue McGleno came home she was in a pissy mood, but when she saw that her flowers had doubled...she laughed.

If you are going to survive a "Klecko Marrige" not only do you have to learn to adapt, but you also have to know how to read trends....the Russian-Jew has gotten pretty good at it over the years. When her laughter subsided, she offered me further advice...

"OK, they are great, but not so great that I want to see a third, do you understand?"

Then she waited for aknowledgment "I asked a question....do you understand?"

Danny Klecko never tells you what he is going to order off a restaurant menu before the server asks, and he never-ever-ever lets women get in the way of what they really want lol. Danny Klecko proceeded to purchase and deliver poinsettias on 25 consecutive evenings.

On day #14 Sue McGleno tried to use logic "At $7 dollars a piece.....for 25 days, that would be...."

Klecko interupted her, she always hates when he pulls numbers from Einstien's muse quicker than her. "I beleave that would be 175 rubels my love!"

Then she kinda got annoyed and said with that money I could buy her something cool, something she wanted. I told her to "respectfully" shut up and let love come to town. She threw her hands up in the air. Face it, what can you get for $175 these days, not much...but to this day she is infamous with all the Oncology chicks that she works with. They echoed Klecko's sentiments and told her it's not her job to direct love, but accept it, or deny it.

Sue McGleno does accept love every day..... for 2 hours.

Tonight we are off to the Mission-American Restaurant in the IDS Center, it is one of my wholesale accounts, and the doctor Sue McGleno works for gave her a $100 gift card to the joint for Christmas. Tonight, Valentines day is celebrated on a Monday! Do you know how stellar this is for chefs, and why?

Dude...the last 2 years this high draw holiday was on the weekend where many concepts have an automatic draw, but Monday and Tuesday can be really slow nights in the Food Show. If tonight's chefs still are working at the same concept next year, they can crunch the numbers and I'll bet that their February numbers will be between 5-20% higher than the last couple of seasons, remember.....February is the shortest month of the year, so a big night at the register tonight means job security for your local Hospitality workers when they eventually match this years quarter against last years.

Be safe out their tonight kids, and don't forget to tip big, you servers are giving up romance to make sure you are able to build romantic traditions.

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