Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Bread Bakers VS Pastry People

I got a request from my friend Marina Sophia Schlesinger. If you have never met really should. She is young,energetic,pretty and has very good taste.
Currently she is over at French Meadow bakery where she cracks the whip while creating wonderful product lines.

This afternoon she requested that I list my observations when it comes to pitting Bread Bakers VS Pastry, and BTW.....any of you can feel free to correct me or add on thoughts of your own.

Pastry People drink wine
Bread Bakers drink from cans with Blue Ribbons on them

Pastry People go to the Opera
Bread Bakers go to the Roller Derby

Pastry People drive cars
Bread Bakers drive trucks

Pastry People think of their art
Bread Bakers think of their paycheck

Pastry People had other options in life
Bread Bakers didn't LOL

Pastry People are intrigued by bread
Bread Bakers are not

Pastry People have large family's
Bread Bakers suffer a obligatory divorce

Pastry People live with cats
Bread Bakers own a dog

Pastry People listen to MPR and watch the BBC
Bread Bakers watch Friday night HBO

Pastry People hate in their minds
Bread Bakers hate with their mouth

Pastry People have tattoo's of roses
Bread Bakers have tattoo's of skulls

Pastry People ride a bicycle
Bread Bakers ride the bus

Pastry People are DFL
Bread Bakers are GOP

Pastry People dare to dream
Bread Bakers live a reoccurring nightmare

Pastry People enjoy Bollywood and IFC
Bread Bakers enjoy the 3 Stooges

Pastry People get yelled at
Bread Bakers get slugged

Pastry People shop at Byerly's and Lund's
Bread Bakers at Cub and Aldi's

Pastry People wear sandals
Bread Bakers wear Red Wing boots

Pastry People got A's and B's
Bread Bakers got D's except for that one A in math

Pastry People read the New York Times
Bread Bakers read the StarTribune

Pastry People get ill
Bread Bakers puke out their mouth and nostrils in unison

Pastry People are New Age
Bread Bakers are Old School

Pastry People Hate Rap Music
Bread Bakers Hate Rap Music

Pastry People talk to Jesus in the light
Bread Bakers talk to the Pope in the dark

OK, you get the Idea. did I get this right Sophia?


  1. So, I guess that makes me a mut.

  2. bravo sir! hilarious. though i don't begrudge a little rap music now and then...
    (thanks for the tipped hat too!)

  3. I am savory, so I fall into the Bread Bakers category! Klecko, this is great!

  4. two thumbs up. the bedrock of Last American Baker.

  5. Pamcakes....never, Sophia......word,Chris....duh, you are the sultan of savory, A.M., WORD!

  6. So good. Klecko, you are a comic genius. What if I am half and half?

  7. I knew I was a Pastry Person when I told some Bread Bakers I was going to give a talk about tea parties - they laughed their a$$es off and said they'd rather be in their backyards, grilling, with a beer in their hands. You got it exactly right, Big K! And, I love you for that! Proof that Bread Bakers and Pastry people can be good friends.

  8. Laura, you bring up a good point, can one be 1/2 and 1/2....boy, i don't know about that. Amy G, I think I actually hang with more Pastry Peeps now days. I like the refined things in life you know LOL!

  9. gotta say it that I am a half and halfer, but moreso baker, long live the badass cooking community

  10. I'm definitely half & half, but honestly, I'd rather be whipping cream!

  11. a lot of fence riders in this crwd, don't any of you have a stance? Geesh........

  12. Totally a Lefty Democrat, wine drinking, classical music, NPR and PBS loving Bread Baker. So, I guess I don't fit any of those stereotypes.

  13. now WAIT a minute. of course, i am mainly a bread and pastry EATER, not baker. and i do like a little rap now and then. but i guess that's a topic for a different blog post.

  14. LOL, so funny. I'm half and half.



  15. Well, I guess I am destined to be a bread baker, but my cakes are delicious!

  16. I'm a tattoo infested, dog loving, motorcycle riding, beer swilling, Doc Martin wearing Pastry Guy.

  17. Klecko, most of us can't take a stand on either side of the fence - any type of baker will say it's good to mix things up! It's like one of those little 12inch ones that you can jump right over.
    This is a pot that won't be stirred, I think! lol

  18. This should become a Facebook quiz: Are you a pastry chef or a bread baker? Maybe there's other personality types, too -- restaurant chef, processed food manufacturer, and brewer. Everyone fits under one of those, right? Maybe a People's Bakery alternative, as well.

  19. I'm a pastry person, right down to my Birkenstocks.

  20. LOL, most of the time I'm neither but I have a great love for eating pastries and breads.

  21. Ouch! I'm a very accomplished amateur bead baker and a less accomplished pastry maker, but I scored 23:5 pastry:bread.

    Maybe the recent success at French Macarons is tilting me to the pastry side.

    Or maybe my recent success in making super shortcrust pastry and shortbread is tilting my numbers?

    Who knows?

  22. Will, of course I would not call you a liar, but i must say if what you say is true.....I will have to bring you into the "Instatute" and run a baterry of tests...LOL

  23. Klecko, one of your best posts yet. BTW, I'm a hybrid ~ wine AND beer, cats only, metal-music-loving, Jesus-in-the-light, bread-kneading, pastry-making girl.

  24. Apart from my emphatic non-dishwash-watery-beer stance - I'm a pastry type!

  25. I'm more bi-polar than half and half on this one. My regular personality is a pastry person, but sometimes I let the baker out of his cage.

  26. "Let the baker out of the cage" Hah.....EXCELLENT!

  27. It's goood to see that I'm 50-50.

  28. I'm a pastry person though I like bread baking a lot too. But my vote goes to pastry...some things are better rich!

  29. I'm more of a pastry person than I thought! Oh wow! LOL!

  30. Candice.....are you telling the truth???? LOL