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Thursday, May 19, 2011

Emotional Flood Gates & the Black Madonna Sourdough Recipe

Over the years, I have seen many people praise God in different ways.

Some people like to sit in silence and reflect, others grab tambourines and bob up and down in the air.

Me, when I approach the throne of God, I like to get caffeinated to the point where I feel like screaming and smashing glass bottles.

This is the state of mind where Klecko feels he is at his best.

Alot of people see God in nature, music - blah-blah-blah, but to be honest, I only see "burning bush" God, or feel that presence when I am with my wife or children.

Today I woke up at day break and pointed my bread truck in the direction of Iowa.

Today my son was coming home.

To prepare for this homecoming I slammed a 5 Hour Energy shot, and guzzled 2 shots of Espresso mixed into a 20 Oz light roast, and uncapped a diet Mountain Dew.

Zip-Zip-Zip!

Music is a big part of praise as well.

When Sue McGleno used to force my son and I to go to non denominational church, they sat in a warehouse size space and "Progressive Christian Bands" blared loud music with screeching electric guitars.

Many people liked it, but my son and I brought our baseball mitts and played catch in the parking lot..

At first Sue McGleno got upset, but when the preacher spoke, we'd go in and listen intently.

I hate being cynical, but a lot of church bands play songs like this, you've heard it right?

JESUS IS LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HE COMES FROM ABOVE!!!!!!!
HE FLY'S DOWN LIKE A DOVE!!
JESUS IS LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Swear to Caesar, I'm not knocking it, but when Danny Klecko vaulted south this morning, or anytime for that matter, he burns a CD that will only contain 3 songs, but he records them in a continuous loop.

When you do this, your mindset will almost become hypnotic, and your thoughts will run a little deeper.

Today on my musical menu I played........

Oasis - Wonder Wall
Oasis - Champagne Super Nova
U2 Window in the Sky

I think I heard this set 19 times between Capitol City and Decorah Iowa.

When I merged onto Hwy 52, the sun was bursting through the clouds in column form just like they do in religious post cards.

Even though I knew me and my son would surely have 39 arguments by tomorrow morning, I was still excited to know he was coming back.

He did well during his first year of studies and football, but I think he struggled having to start all over.

In his senior year of high school he was captain of the football and baseball team.

He won city championships with boys that he grew up with.


But now he lives in a corn field. In Iowa. Amongst Amish.


When most people send their kids off to college, their children evolve socially.


Usually this starts with their son (or daughter) approaching people and telling them their name.

My son....he has a working title.

Apparently everybody in the Hawkeye state knows him as Tydus.

When he went through some of his struggles, I was a little hard on him as fathers can be, but I remember during Christmas break I kinda had a mini revelation.

I was at Super Target and as I walked through the toy aisle....eye spied an Etch-A-Sketch.

Within seconds I had both hands off my cart an was turning the knobs back and forth, trying to manipulate the lines into a form of a house.

I had taken on this task 1000 times as a kid, but no matter how deliberate, how articulate I was.....

My stupid houses looked like they were constructed by Helen Keller.

The walls were all boxy, and the roofs pitch was always at a perfect 270 degrees, but my door always sucked.

I couldn't get dimension on that entryway, I couldn't make it pop.

And at that time I thought my entire self worth rode on making a bad a** Etch-A-Sketch house.

Almost 50 years later, my skills as a contractor have gotten no better, but the one thing that I have realized over 5 decades of life is I am not a complete loser, just because I can't get my lines to go where I want them to.

I think Tydus started to get that as well.......

But just like a Disney film, every story with a happy ending will usually be that much better if you add strife into the plot line.

About 1/3 of the way there, my happiness was paramount. I was singing, smiling, it was one of the few moments when I was alone in my life, and not upset by that.

But them the clouds kinda got overcast, and I think I was passing through a town called Madden, or Maddox, something like that.

Then all of a sudden I thought about my daughter, and how she was in Omaha, and so far away from me, and my emotional flood gates opened.

When I was young, tough, stupid and cynical, life was easier in so many ways.

For 30 years I never shed a tear, but now days it doesn't take much.

For 4 or 5 miles I felt like wailing, I missed my daughter so terribly and her absence was now being magnified by her brothers return.

But then I looked up and there was what I think was a vulture, and it was in the middle of the highway eating some raccoon roadkill. I can't be sure though, I don't know if Ive ever seen a vulture.

Next my Droid started ringing, and I talked to my Timberwolves ticket agent for a moment,when our conversation started, I turned off the music, I always hate when people have their radios on during phone conversations.

That's rude.

After I hung up though, I accidentally hit radio mode instead of CD.

I gotta admit I was somewhat astonished that some rube Iowa radio station was playing Joan Jett's version of "The Little Drummer Boy"

If you've never heard it, you should, it's on the "B" side of her album that has "I Love Rock & Roll."

The reception was kinda grainy, but I continued listening to it anyway.

The song reminded me of 11th grade, but then I started wondering.....

Why is an Iowa radio station playing this Christmas tune in May.

Rural highways can bend your mind into unusual positions, because when I thought about the song "Little Drummer Boy", I asked myself....

"What would I give the Baby Jesus if he were placed at my feet today."

Then it came to me, I would give him the recipe to the greatest bread I have ever made in my life.

Without a doubt this would be my Black Sourdough with golden raisins.

I developed it for the Arch Duke of Austria when he came to the Twin Cities for the National Austrian / Hungarian conference.

In fact they transformed the entire Landmark center to resemble the palace of Austria.

To this day this bread is served daily at the Saint Paul Hotel. W/o a doubt the most prestigious hotel in Saint Paul, if not the entire state.

Do you want me to let you in on a secret?

It's really a Pollack bread LOL, but you knew that.

In the spirit of celebrating the return of my prodigal son, and the sadness in my heart for missing my daughter and granddaughter.....

I submit to you.........


The Black Madonna Loaf -


1 1/3 cup brick starter

2 3/4 cup water

1/3 cup apple cider vinegar

2 tablespoon honey

4 tablespoon B/S molasses

1/2 cup cocoa

2 tablespoons active dry yeast

7 cup AP flour

1 3/4 cup pumpernickel flour

3 tablespoon caraway seeds

1 tablespoon salt

2 cups golden raisins

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